Sincerely, Anita.

A Product Review: Shea Moisture-- Moisture Retention Shampoo

2011-05-07T23:35:00.000-07:00

So I recently discovered the Shea Moisture-- Moisture Retention Shampoo and I must say it was love at first try! As you will see in a further post (like perhaps maybe the next post that I make), my hair was beyond tangled before washing my hair with this shampoo!

Like seriously, BEYOND tangled!

I didn't even bother to try and put a comb through it because along with my initial futile attempts at "detangling" the beast that sat on top of my head that day, I suffer from MAJOR tenderheadedness (if that's even a word!). So before shampooing on this occasion I grabbed (literally) six sections of hair and clamped them down with some hair clamps such as the one pictured below.

I literally did no detangling, whatsoever, before washing my hair on this occasion! And believe it or not I had no problems! I honestly believe that the Shea Moisture shampoo had EVERYTHING to do with my easy to manage hair after washing. In fact, this was the first time that I have ever washed hair that hadn't been detangled prior to getting wet.

ANYWAYS

Enough Rambling! On to the review! So here is the video that I created on my YouTube Channel (Jazzybee445) about the shampoo. Enjoy! :)

So in a nutshell I give this product: ★★★★★

It is definitely a new favorite of mine and I see myself using it well into the future!

Pros:

Keeps hair soft and moisturized throughout shampooing process: doesn't strip hair.
It has a soft velvety texture that goes on smooth
A little goes a long way: So a small dime sized amount is enough for each of my large sections.
It helps with manageability
I definitely noticed a shine in my hair-- But you saw the video! You be the judge of that :)

Cons:

The price per bottle is $9.99-- Although I got mine for $5.00 each because of the BOGO sale at Walgreen's, I still see the price as being a problem in the future when I run out and want to buy it again. I am on a budget and at this moment ten dollars for shampoo is not practical.
At first I was not a fan of the smell, however once I saw how great this shampoo made my hair feel and how much easier it made my detangling process, the smell became a menial inconvenience that has actually grown on me :).

Anyways thats all folks! Have any questions or comments?? leave them down below~! :)

When you do so much for the world

2011-04-23T18:44:00.001-07:00

When you do so much for the world you may find the feeling satisfactory despite your utter tiredness.
When you do so much for the world, the sun may seem to shine, the clouds may seem to part and perhaps the flowers may seem to bloom.

But when your always busy doing so much for the world,
What do you ever do for yourself?

I do so much for the people around me. I make sure they have things they want, I make sure they are happy with my every decision and at the end of the day I make sure they have a good nights sleep!

But here I am lonely, tired and worn out. My sleeps are filled with nightmares and my happiness has been drained. In my previous post I may have promised a plan of action, but I've got nothing. I may have thought about it a time or two, but that does nothing for the fact that I have not been able to pull something together….

I think I am depressed :-(...

There is no other explanation for the fact that I am not myself. I have not been myself for so long that perhaps this is myself. I have noticed and intrinsic pattern here… perhaps all of my post have been a little on the dark side…. Hmmm

I promise rainbows next time
k?

Contemplating the Purpose

2011-03-20T13:14:00.001-07:00

I’m not quite sure why this is but lately I have been allowing my life to continue on without me. Perhaps this is the same old, but at some point in my life everyday was exciting and new and filled with great surprises . I used to be told that my life was like a movie-- I guess that means drama and excitement and lots of random spontaneous moments. But lately, say the past 3 or so years it’s been pretty drab in the land of Anita. Nothing seems to happen, nothing seems to move and everything seems to just be, same old and boring.

I feel like I’m heading in this vast land of un-original and dull. What has come of me???

I’m getting so restless and the feeling I have when I wake up in the morning is not one of utter gratefulness but rather a feeling of… “here we go again”.

Clearly this is a problem… for me and my sanity. I’m looking outside the window of my bed room right now, seriously wondering what can I do to overcome this slump? I means gees! Am I depressed??

It’s actually raining outside, pretty hard at that. Not exactly the ideal ambiance for contemplating a change for the better, but I suppose it’s all in how you look at it, right?

I mean the rain doesn’t always have to be dark and dreary it could mean new beginnings… imagine how many seeds are becoming implanted and how bright and green the grass will be the next morning. And think of all the beautiful new flower buds that may begin to bloom.

So what is my vow???

Hmm... well I guess I shall start small. I want things to be different in my life! I need more stories to tell, new experiences and special moments. I need to feel like I’m living for more than just the rush of time that passes me by each day before I go to bed! So my next post shall be my purpose…my goals… some kind of step forward.

Ok?

Going Natural

2011-02-28T02:40:00.001-08:00

So I have decided to embrace the kinks, coils and curls that God has blessed me with.

This is nothing new, just the first time that I am introducing the idea to this blog :).

For all intensive purposes...

Im pretty excited. I started taking better care of and embracing my hair June 1, 2010... Not quite a year from that time yet, but since then I have learned alot.

So you may be asking, what the heck is the purpose of this post!?!

Well... I guess it's just to inform you that perhaps from now on I may be doing hair post's, maybe that's all I'm going to be doing... Maybe I may not do it often... or maybe everyday... I really dont know... *sigh*... But hopefully, whatever i choose to do, someone out there will be reading :)...

To You Piano Man...

2009-04-10T01:09:00.000-07:00

I dont need a man to complete me!

But i must admit there is this one man,
who, when around, makes me feel pretty complete...

now that he is gone things feel pretty lonley...

if your out there, love
understand i am lonely without you,
lonely as in... i have no one else....
i feel no one else...
like i felt you, always there... even when you weren't your heart was with me...

but it has now set mines free

my heart now lingers... in an empty space

alone...

where are you babe?

when i find myself.. i shall then go look for you... because only when i have truly found who im intended to be..
can i be one, with who you truly are...

we are the ingredients of love....

or

you are the ingredient into my heart

we shall be, again... :)

and next time we will bake a cake...I LOVE YOU, my piano man.....

now that he is no longer around,
haven't seen him in a month, life feels pretty incomplete...
struggling to find my purpose without him....
fighting to keep my distance from him in order to find myself...
Funny

i am looking for the person i have been my entire life,
as if me has escaped me...

a little confused if you cant tell...

but out of all this a better artist has emerged... because my inspiration level has increased drastically...

does that mean the escape of my great love has been a benefit instead of a catastrophe... id like to think otherwise..

how can i call him my soul mate when his absence has sprung from within me art...
his absences has brought the words to my heart
that i had been looking for... the duration of our existence as lovers...

Am I alone now?...

FOUND

2009-04-10T00:22:00.000-07:00

inspiration has found me it seems..
it feels almost as if there is an invincible layer of creativity that has stumbled upon me. hmmm....
well its been a while, since ive actually posted something. however dont get me wrong ive written a billion other blogs just havent posted them, mostly unfinished because i fail to be truly inspired about anything that i have written. Its funny because to write is my passion, its the only way that i can truly express myself. I remember when i was a kid, when i had problems with my parents or something, i'd sit up all night and write them a letter, then the next morning id fold it nice and perfectly and place it neatly on their pillow lol.. then that was the end of that. i never approached them about it, and they never approached me. However i did get my point across because things did change.

Anyways to this day, there seems to be an endless supply of shit to be said locked inside of me, i just fail to say any of it. I can never write it down because there just doesnt seem to be the words to say any of it. i know im not the only one who feels any of this.. or at least i hope im not.
well dears, because of this endless amount of juice i seem to have inside of me on this day there may be another post soon, maybe a minuet from now... lol dont think me crazy..

Normal

2008-08-26T20:18:00.000-07:00

So, I cleaned up my room! I cleaned out my closet and gave away all the clothes that have needed to leave my life now for so long. Everything seems so organized now! I'm back in school and i have a job but for some reason I still just don't feel assured about much at all.

I don't feel like I have cleaned up my life. It seems to me that although I have made my appearance seem physically more put together, my brain remains scattered and confused on what it is I want to do with my self and life. I'm so frustrated and annoyed by everyday occurrences, I wonder ever too often when will they become extinct, these everyday repetitive things. How is one to make their life at all exciting, when every day is the same old thing? How is a person like me who loves the adventure of new and spontaneous, who loves the random and out there, supposed to adapt to the ordinary... the same... the boring... the usual... and the nothing has and ever will change?

I feel like im trapped and I feel like, in so many ways, it's killing my spirit and taking with it my self esteem. I dont feel like my self and rarely am I ever genuinely happy.

At this point in my life I find myself struggling with the question of what I want to spend the next sixty or seventy years of my life doing. I cant seem to find one thing on this earth I love that much. The things I do in fact love seem so out of reach! And for some reason I just don't have the drive and determination to go after them. I mean, I guess that's my fault right? Maybe that means I don't deserve it, maybe because im just so unfocused and so unrealistic about things I just deserve to remain this way. This feels so unfair, because what ever it is that makes me this way, I didn't choose for it to choose me.

I just want to be normal and want normal things and live a normal life and just take normal everyday situations the way they are supposed to be taken. Normal!

A Problem with loving myself

2008-08-18T20:55:00.000-07:00

Okay, so i guess this blog isn't gonna be all poetic and nonsensical. the truth is, i have a problem with loving myself. When i look in the mirror at myself, all i see is everything i wish could be different about me, like how i hate the size of my nose, or how i wish these stupid acne bumps would just leave me the fuck alone! i look into my eyes and i see dark circles from not caring enough to get enough sleep. When i get ready to go somewhere, most of the time i just throw on anything, because i really just don't feel like getting ready, i don't feel like making myself look good, or feel good. I envy the girls who effortlessly live to care for themselves, the ones who always remember to put on their perfume and make sure that their hair always looks nice. I envy the girls who seem to have an endless amount of cute cloths in their closet for every day of the year. i envy those who routinely get their nails and feet done, or the ones who make it their business to get a massage every other tuesday afternoon with the girls. I wish i could be like that. but my problem is i have no love for myself. I want soo bad to pamper myself and give myself nice things. I want soo badly to wake up and feel beautiful and feel energized and ready for the day. I hate being stressed all the time, and always having a million things to get done, but not ever doing any of it. I want so badly to be more responsible, and organized. i looove all my friends but i barley spend time with any of them, because im always soo wrapped up in my unorganized life. I just want to feel like im on top of things, and i want to feel beautiful, i want to be relaxed and stress free. I really want the best for myself, but some how ive seemed to have dug up a hole around me, that im trying so hard to get out of. I really just want to let go of the negative influences in my life and be one with God and in-sync with Anita. Its so hard, and thats something i dont think anyone will understand. When you really want to love yourself, where do you start? when you really want to be some one what do you do? I just want to love me, i want to pamper me and give me good things, i want to bathe me in beautiful oils, and sit in the tub and relax with jill scott on and incense buring. I want to read, something i loove to do, but never have time to do anymore. I want to go to sleep and wake up refreshed something i cant do because my job prevents me from it ( seeing that i have to be there at 5 am every morning pretty much ). It seems to me that i have so many problems, and the biggest one is that every so often i go through this phase right here, where i, on certain days, want to do good by me, but for some reason i can never stay motivated long enough to really go through with it. Well im going to make a promise to me and God and the world right now, because i really want to make a change, i want to make a more relaxed, more soulful, more beautiful and carefree Anita, starting today. So i made a goal for myself today, and it is to clean the clutter from out of my life, lol starting with my closet, i have cloths in there that i've had since i was 7 and still haven't let go of yet. wish me luck... and motivation because im really gonna need it. ( ill update you tomorrow on my progress)

Reflecting upon Reflection

2008-08-02T00:24:00.000-07:00

Gracefully i stare, reflecting upon the reflection that stares back at me staring back at it, staring back and forth we stare reflecting.
What reflects back to me when relfecting upon reflection is the mistakes that shaped the reflection i see..
I, a shapeless being, stand reflecting upon a being shaped by mistakes made..
So i guess that makes my shaplessness a shape less, because of the mistakes that have shaplessly shaped it.

The Mathematics

2008-05-23T13:08:00.000-07:00

In the mathematics of it all
its never really time to understand, that which we just don't
only when faced with adversity do we realize that 1+1 will always just equal 2
and somewhere in that equation, a 1 will be you
its simple really
but we'd rather make it difficult
adding negatives and decimals, to make our own equation
as if the plain old simple truth is wrong
as if somehow it can be changed
but in the end, you will still just be 1
and 2 will always just be the number you thrive for....

In a very rare occasion we each will become a 2
with another 1
maybe not as tall, or not as bright
maybe 1 with the top curved over
or a 1 who stands up straight
maybe a 1, who is incomplete
but somehow you'll fit,
like a puzzle piece
and realize you are now a 2
when you become that 2 both of you 1's will form and mold to be the perfect shape
maybe you will lay and surrender, become the foundation (_)
maybe you will be what holds you both together, the one who carries the burdens,
or you'll be the one who rides freely on the top..... dancing
which ever 1 you are..
to become just a 1 again will be your biggest fear..
for then.. you'd only be considered a half..
because, you see, a 2 is a single number not 2 ones
in all great equations those two ones, must become one 2
you'd then be missing your other half and become a fragment, or decimal

life is the journey of ones, who seek to become a two
the journey of sacrifices and love
maybe even broken hearts
but then mended ones
life is the unsolved equation that some how we are all apart of...
and somehow all the negatives and positives
halves and wholes
have a place somewhere...
somewhere in your destiny

Salvaged Goods

2008-05-19T01:44:00.000-07:00

I lay here now, in my bed, thinking. Not quite sure whats on my mind, but then again I'm never sure about that. My mind confuses me, my thoughts drift like the oceans waves visible only for a split seconds glimpse.

What does it mean to call your self a writer but yet never have anything to write? Maybe, then I'm just not a writer, but simply a girl confused about her destiny. Then i must ask myself what exactly is my destiny? or destiny in general? sometimes i feel like I'm just here in this world wasting air, and taking up space. I make no contributions to the world, i have saved no lives, i have done nothing, but yet and still i remain. So i guess my destiny is to be here, maybe my destiny is to just, be here.. kind of like the wind, its just here, blowing invisible dreams, thrown across the world, gathering dirt and dead leaves, empty.

Maybe I'm just empty. the problem with that is i don't feel empty, but cluttered. Cluttered with shit from years ago, broken dreams and bits and pieces of my heart, here and there. my thoughts float around like the air gathering dirt, and dead leaves i don't even have use for but still seem to be attached to. I'm a cluttered soul, chaotic in a sense. but unwavering, persistent to stay in my current state of mind. Maybe because i just feel more comfortable this way. I somehow feel more secure when I'm surrounded by a load of junk. it keeps me safe in a way. It keeps my life intact. I'm held together by a decades worth of upsets, and let downs, arguments and fights negative feelings and emotions that i should have set free years ago, but still hold on to , as if they are precious, because somehow, they are all that i feel comfort in.

Somehow, they are all that makes everything feel right. but that's wrong, because they are wrong. they are always what makes things wrong. they are the reason my life feels so wrong. but i cant let them go, I'm like the bag lady in Erika Badu's song. I wont blame my condition on a boy like most people or girls do, because it has never been a boy. in fact i don't know what its ever been, its always just been. like i was born a shattered human being... salvaged goods.